How my addiction to football betting almost ruined my life.

Written by: Toyosi Adebusuyi

Summary: Gambling, especially football betting, is extremely popular in Nigeria. Many Nigerians view gambling as a harmless leisure activity: a recent study of the Nigerian general population found that 36% of adult respondents had gambled and 53% of these people were daily gamblers.

While people gamble for different reasons — entertainment, joblessness, and the rising cost of living; the quest for quick wealth can easily lead to addiction. This article explores the life of a young Nigerian man, Femi who started betting while he was a student at the University. We discuss how what seemed to be a harmless means to an end evolved into a full-blown addiction and how he was able to overcome this problem.

Femi, 28.

Femi started betting because he saw it as an opportunity to make more money for himself in school; after all, most of his friends were betting as well and encouraged him to jump on the bandwagon

“When I was in school, I gambled for fun. It was entertaining and also a way to bond with my guys while making extra money on the side. At the time, I was receiving an allowance of N10,000 from my parents and would use small amounts between N50-N200 to bet. Those days, whenever I had excess money, I didn’t think about betting. I would instead use the money to shop for clothes. It never occurred to me to overindulge in my betting habits. Little did I know I was walking on a path that was going to cost me almost everything I had.”

The journey to his betting addiction began…

Nobody starts off with a plan to become a gambling addict. The process of developing a gambling addiction can take decades, for some — while others find themselves struggling with gambling very soon after their first bet. For Femi, it was the latter.

After completing his studies at the University, he was posted to Calabar to begin his NYSC, a compulsory service year for all Nigerian students and those in the diaspora who intend to work in the country. He intentionally requested Calabar while filling out his application form because he wanted to experience a different culture as he had never gone beyond the borders of the South-west.

A few weeks into being a Calabar corper, Femi resumed gambling. He was surrounded by a circle of new friends who were neck-deep in the act and because the allowance from the government was nothing to really write home about, and he had previously made money from football betting in school, he didn’t see the harm in picking up from where he left off. Betting started to slowly overtake every other part of his life, competing for front-row seats.

“While I served in Calabar, I would wake up as early as 6:30 am and join a long queue of gamblers to stake money at a local bet9ja shop. I would gladly skip meals at different intervals and starve myself just to place a bet.. I really couldn’t be bothered, it was all I started to look forward to. I loved the thrill of winning, and even when I lost, there was this hopeful spark that I could be lucky next time. A huge part of my N19,800 NYSC allowance went into funding my betting lifestyle. And even though I made some extra money on the side, it only fueled my interest in betting because I was working with a guy who owned a prediction website”.

At this point in his life, Femi hadn’t realized he was getting addicted. He thought he was being responsible with his money by trying to create a wealthy life for himself. By the time he completed his NYSC, he came back home with no savings with the excuse “how can I save from that small allowance”? He made a promise to himself and his parents that he was going to do better when he got a proper job. A few months later, he was welcomed into the workforce with an attractive salary of N75,000.

From N19,800 to N75,000? Of course, he felt like he had arrived! And this new job was at a very exotic resort. He had his own personal room and could always chill by the beachside. Again, he would be isolated from family and close friends but that didn’t matter. It felt like a fresh start, the beginning of financial independence. But, did he make better financial choices? You’ll see…

He incurred his first debt and a lot more

It’s every parent’s dream to see their children excel and Femi’s parents didn’t feel any different. They were very happy to see their son on his way to becoming financially stable. Of course, they didn’t like that he wasn’t able to attend the holy mass on Sundays but they were grateful that he was finally earning more money so they supported him. His sister on the hand was in school and was stoked she was in a place to be able to boldly ask her brother for money. Typical last-born behaviour, hehehehe.

Unfortunately, things didn’t go as everybody thought, it didn’t look like Femi was actually earning money. He would always complain about being broke, and how it was hard to save money. He cited things like the cost of transportation, data and feeding as being responsible for his inability to save money. His parents knew how much he was earning and spending so they couldn’t wrap their heads around why it was hard to save at least N20,000. It wasn’t like Femi ever really shopped for clothes, or shoes or even partied a lot so it was shocking for him to come home once in two weeks acting broke.

“When I started working in the resort, I was sort of the local champion. I had a larger skill set than most of the staff and even the ones that were still in school were working at the resort on a part-time basis. The more I related with these guys, the more I was drawn into betting. It was almost like everywhere I stepped my feet, the devil had placed people that would fuel my betting desires. I even met a guy who introduced me to betting in a more strategic way, but this time with a higher spend. Before I’ll bet with N5000–10,000 but with this new method, I started playing with higher amounts, up to N50,000. More than 50% of my salary. 99% of the time, I lost all the money but continued regardless because I was positive my luck would shine one day”.

You must be wondering, where was Femi getting all the money to feed his betting addiction?

Well, loan companies! Whenever he lost money, he’d download some of these loan apps and borrow money from them and was always using his next salary as a means to pay back with the hopes that one day, he’ll win a large sum of money and be announced as a millionaire soon enough”.

“I knew I had become addicted because all that started to occupy my mind was betting. I was always looking for more money to not only bet but repay my loans. I barely had enough to feed on. It didn’t help that I was also alone. You know what they say about an idle man’s brain is the devil’s workshop. I wasn’t idle but I wasn’t doing much either, I mostly spent time alone in the room allocated to me and was only summoned when I was needed so betting really had the chance to cling tight to me. It became uncontrollable”.

Femi couldn’t even continue to support his family with the little donations he started when he first resumed work, he had totally exhausted all his money on betting and after one year of working at this resort, he had nothing to show for it. No savings, no investments, just bad loans.

Things got better and then, worse

Some months later, Femi got another job with an Indian construction company and for a while, he stopped betting. This time, he was rolling with people that had a positive influence on his life, the kind that motivated him to be better. But, it didn’t last long until he went back to betting.

“I really enjoyed working at this new company but the salary was very inconsistent. They started to owe money and even started to be dishonest so I left. I got a new job as a technical support analyst at a tech company that paid me N150,000 monthly. It wasn’t even up to 5 months since I left the resort that paid me N75,000 so it was a pretty huge win for me. This new job presented me with an opportunity to start all over, on a clean slate. No debts, no gambling, just consistent savings, budgeting and financial discipline. But, I couldn’t. I was too weak. All I could think about was how much I could stake to make more money, I already pictured myself sitting on millions. I wasn’t prepared for the turn of events, it completely ruined my mental state”.

Femi piled up the highest amount of debt during this period. As of the end of 2021, he had accumulated a total debt of up to a million across 8–12 loan companies. He had borrowed different loan amounts from each of these companies and was beginning to slack on the deadlines.

“Since I started betting, I would say I’ve spent close to N3 million naira and gained almost nothing. I lost my mind, my money, and even my family’s trust. I would lie to them and come up with fraudulent schemes to gain sympathy so they’ll give me money but they failed. I was slowly dying. I had allowed my lack of contentment to take complete control of my mind, I felt worthless.

I also realised how fickle-minded I was because if it wasn’t for that, I wouldn’t have allowed friends to cajole me into a life-destructing activity like gambling. How was I supposed to pay a million naira on a N150k salary and a two-month deadline? These companies were chasing me with calls and threatening to arrest me, beat me up and plaster my image across as a fraudster. With all these, I still continued to gamble”.

Where do we go from here?

“A million naira? Why can’t he just stop gambling already”?

“He has incurred debt multiple times, so why is he still betting”?

“He’s unhappy about his financial situation, so what’s the point”?

I know you have questions but if you’ve been around somebody with an addiction problem, you’ll understand that it’s not that easy to stop. If you’re a compulsive gambler, you can’t control the impulse to gamble, even when it has negative consequences for you or your loved ones. You’ll gamble whether you’re up or down, broke or flush, and you’ll keep gambling regardless of the consequences — even when you know that the odds are against you or you can’t afford to lose. Those with gambling disorders are psychologically unable to control their gambling, and often, treatment is required for an individual to stop and keep them from gambling in the future.

Femi asked himself all these questions too. He wanted to stop and make his parents proud. He wanted to gain the respect of his sister and do better for himself and his finances. He was tired too, so tired he started having depressing thoughts. Suicide felt like the only option, but he had a saving grace.

Femi got his happy ending

Remember when I told you about how Femi’s parents couldn’t wrap their heads around why their son was always broke? They decided to investigate. His mum had a hunch that things had gotten worse so she asked somebody to look into his bank statement. There were preparations in place to send Femi out of the country so she had his bank details. When the statement came in, she noticed he had been paying a huge amount of money to loan companies on a weekly and monthly basis. It was all he was using his salary for. Where did she go wrong? “She cried so much because she had failed in raising him right”.

“I felt my parent’s pain. They were disappointed, they didn’t expect me to be caught up in such a toxic gambling web. I’m not from a rich background. My parents hustled to get me through school and they didn’t deserve this. I wanted the ground to swallow me. The only reason I got through my addiction to gambling was because of my parents. They didn’t stop processing my admission to the UK because of this setback. They borrowed money from their cooperative to help me repay my loans and halted the building process of their house to get me to London. While on my flight to the UK, I was still getting threatening messages from these loan companies. I wept, and I beat myself up. I had been a constant slave to betting for 8 years. I wouldn’t have done it without them”.

The UK gave Femi room to begin a new life in a new country on a new slate. When he got to London, he felt so alive. He knew he still had to pay not only his parents back, but his uncles who supported his loan payments, but he was grateful he was away from Nigeria, a place that reminded him of nothing but hardship”.

Lessons learned.

Like every other form of addiction, betting habits are gradually built up. Some people play and get away with it, some play, and get stuck for life. There are a couple of lessons you could pick from this story.

  • Practice self-awareness: This helps you understand yourself better, and who you are, especially when it comes to money. Take this quiz to find out your money personality.
  • Automate your savings: When you put structures in place for your money, it reduces unhealthy spending temptations. You can do this on the Moni App available on Google Play and App Store.
  • Keep friends that share similar values as you.
  • Don’t keep your financial problems to yourself. Always speak up when you notice you’re derailing.
  • Only you can help you. It doesn’t matter the number of books you read, or the losses you incur, if you don’t make up your mind to stop, it’ll be hard to get help or assistance from friends, family or even therapists.

“I shared my story because I know how hard it is to deal with addiction. Shouting won’t help, blaming or shaming people involved won’t either. I hope that my story inspires somebody struggling with betting addiction to take the bold step to stop. I really pray that you get the corsage and strength to turn away from it. Speak up, let in people. I’m really grateful for my parents and I never want to feel as depressed and worthless as I felt during my gambling days”.

Do you know anyone struggling with a gambling addiction? You can read more about how you could support them here and here.

The Moni App is perfect for instilling financial discipline. We’re currently running a limited offer on the reserve plan called the #NewYearNewMoni challenge that allows you to earn up to 28% interest on your savings.

SHARE THIS STORY

SHARE

Related Blogs

Community
Finance For Africa

Download the Moni App and access
Community Finance powered by social trust.

Lagos

12, Jasper Ike, Lekki Lagos.

San Francisco

548 Market St, San Francisco, California, 94104-5401

Your Business

Your Moni

Legal

Moni is a product of Rank Capital Inc.

Moni logo - white test